Speling Be

This just in from the Who Thinks This Stuff Up? Department: There's reportedly a new tick-borne illness going around. That may or may not be true, but the point is more than one person has spotted a young deer in the Victoria Woods area wearing a white flea/tick collar. Apparently it was put on by some possibly well-meaning person when the animal was a fawn a couple years ago. ...What a great idea. Not only does it keep the tick population down, but as the deer grows the collar will eventually strangle it to death, hence solving the deer problem as well. ...I'd ask what some people use for brains but I'm afraid of the answer.

Which leads me to my next burning question: Is speling impordant? ...Aparantly not, cuz u woodunt beleve how few peepul bother too use spelchek. Its' no good getting all agast about it ether, becuz u dont need to spel to make lots of money.

And how about this: Kudos to the community mentoring program for local schools, but what say we quit firing teachers so we won't need so many mentors and tutors? ...How is it not possible for responsible grownups to deduce that education is the most important -- and perhaps the only -- road to saving this country from itself? ...And yet, here we are, close to the very bottom of the international pile of developed countries when it comes to education. ...But man, ken thos kidz text! And what great subject matter, too...

If Jay Leno's Jaywalkers segment, in which people can't answer the simplest questions -- like who was George Washington -- isn't as frightening as it is funny, then all hope is lost.

Chinese lessons, anyone?

Meanwhile, our editor has decided to take a little break before the next issue and has gone to find America -- guess where she looked first:

That's right, the crapper.

Send me your own important misspelled observations at oliverdeplace@hotmail.com or post them on my Facebook page. I need a laugh.