Dispatch Desk, July 19 edition

10:15 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to Stone Financial on reports of three dogs running loose. An officer tried to track the dogs, but his sense of smell could not match that of the alleged skilled hunting dogs.

2:02 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Victoria Inn and Convention Center on report of a suspicious van parked behind the building. Officer advised that it was workers clearing brush from the area.

12:53 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Eureka Suites on report of a person refusing to leave his room after being requested to go. Officer responded and found individual packing his vehicle to leave -- and just in the knick of time.

1:41 p.m. -- Caller reported a non-guest swimming in the pool at Carolyn's Ozark Swiss Inn. An officer responded and found that they were guests at the Inn and the caller was sorely mistaken.

7:23 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to US 62 on report of a child walking along the highway. Officer responded but was unable to locate the child. Let's hope it was just an apparition.

3:52 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Harding Spring on report of an illegally parked car. Shame on that car; it should know the rules by now.

7:14 p.m. -- Police responded to call about a yellow purse that was left on the stone wall at Basin Park. An officer gleefully responded and took the purse to ESPD, where it is being safely kept.

7:16 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Ravine Street for theft report. Officer responded; report was taken.

12:08 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to Motel 6 on report of loud music coming from the parking lot. Officer responded and music was stopped for the night. If it's too loud, you might be too old!

9:41 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to US 62 on report of phone lines sagging. You can't help gravity; things sag with age.

10:16 a.m. -- Caller advised police of a Yorkie running around Kettle Campground and Cabins caller thought it was a stray. The officer checked and found the dog safe with its owner.

3:10 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Bubba's BBQ on report of a broken-down trolley. How many times must we say that you cannot grease trolley gears with barbecue sauce?

3:27 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Lookout Lodge on report of a large dog on the property again. Animal Control responded and took the animal to owner. Sometimes a dog just wants to love you and eat all your porridge -- or was that bears that want porridge?

6:10 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Harvey Road on report of suspicious woman going door-to-door and selling items for "community service." Guess it depends on your definition of community -- yours or hers.

5:40 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Pivot Rock Village regarding a teenage solicitor. The caller advised that the there are 'no soliciting' signs posted on his property. The officer arrived, like a boss, and advised the teenagers to obey the posted signs or else.

3:47 p.m. -- Caller advised police that they had observed a white sports car on US 62 passing multiple vehicles near Bluebird Mountain Inn and that the driver in question should be near Eureka Springs by then. Officers responded with lightning quickness, but, alas, their police cars lack hyperdrive. Suspect gone upon arrival.

4:09 p.m. -- Caller advised police that he saw a guy earlier in the week trying to pitch a tent in town and that he was behind Wagner's Inn setting up camp. An officer responded and found no person pitching a tent of any kind -- although people pitching fits are not that unusual.

12:54 a.m. -- Caller advised police of a one-car traffic accident near Lake Leatherwood bridge. Caller also advised that they think the driver was intoxicated. How they knew the man was intoxicated remains a mystery. Police responded to find that the allegedly intoxicated man had fled the scene.

1:34 a.m. -- Caller advised police that there was a man passed out on the ground in the parking lot of Rowdy Beaver. Officer responded and got the man a taxi to his hotel. Any person that can sleep on the ground without regard deserves a ride to his destination.

2:10 a.m. -- Police were dispatched near the Funnel Cake Factory on report of a male arguing with a female. The caller was concerned about the female's well-being. An officer responded and found everything to be OK.

4:17 p.m. -- Caller advised police of motorcyclists revving up their pipes on Spring Street. Officer responded and found no bikes being exceptionally loud. Hmmmm...

6:46 p.m. -- Caller reported that she was blocked in by an illegally parked vehicle at the courthouse and she cannot leave. Upon the officers arrival he found that she was, in fact, the one who was illegally parked and blocking in the other vehicle. Ha.

8:15 p.m. -- Caller advised police that a German Shepherd mix came up and he doesn't know where it lives. The kind person took the dog to the ESPD and it was placed in doggie jail until it could be claimed by its owner.

9:34 p.m. -- Police were advised of a male subject "standing around making everyone uncomfortable." Officer responded and found the subject standing by his car. The man was arrested for public intoxication. Creeper.

12:01 a.m. -- Caller from Eureka Springs Hospital advised police that there was a green SUV parked where the helicopter lands. Officer responded and found the owner and the car was moved. Imagine an SUV spinning in the parking lot with its wheels out: "Look, Ma, no hands!"

4:15 a.m. -- Caller advised police that there was a two or three cars full of young people in the parking lot and it seemed suspicious. An officer responded and found everything to be legit. Too legit too quit, in fact.

3:59 p.m. -- Caller advised police of intoxicated persons getting on their motorcycles near the Rowdy Beaver Den. Officer responded, where he found the group at a motel; a truck had picked them up and brought them to their motel, they said. Likely story!

5:33 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Traveler's Inn on reports of an unwanted person refusing to leave. An officer responded and advised the person to go.

9:46 p.m. -- Caller advised the police that he could hear screaming and yelling coming from a house near him. Police responded only to find it was people enjoying the pool, labeit rambunctiously, in their backyard.

12:06 p.m. -- Brush fire in the creek bed on CR 150. The blaze was quickly contained and extinguished.