Dispatch Desk, July 26 edition

2:23 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to Subway on report of an alarm. Officer responded and found it to be a false alarm. No, Jared has not broken his Subway diet.

7:17 a.m. -- Caller reported a possible intoxicated driver on US 62 driving a maroon Subaru without a back window. Officer responded but was unable to locate the vehicle the caller described. He was likely backtracking to figure out where he left the window.

July 17

5:44 p.m. -- Police responded to reports of a white semi with a pie sign tailgating a vehicle near Rapid Roberts. Caller advised that the semi had yellow tire guards. Officer responded and did not locate a semi matching the description. Perhaps he got hijacked by the Purple Pieman.

July 18

4:12 p.m. -- Police were dispatched to Pig Trail Kart-N-Golf on report of illegal trash dumping. Officer made contact with the person who dumped the trash and they are returning to pick it up. Leaving personal information in the garbage when you illegally dump trash is not a smart move.

4:31 p.m. -- Officer responded to traffic accident involving a parked car on White Street. Caller advised that the accident broke her taillight. The officer took a report and the lady mourned over her broken light.

July 19

4:13 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to Valley View Mobile Home Park on report of a suspicious-smelling odor. Officer responded and advised the odor was from a dead animal. Could have been worse!

12:55 p.m. -- Caller reported a fight in a room at Stonegate Inn. As an officer arrived the couple in question was leaving the property. All OK. If men acknowledged that women are always right, perhaps there would be fewer arguments... just sayin'. :)

July 20

3:15 a.m. -- Caller from the Brighton Ridge Nursing Home advised police of a young prowler on the property. Officer responded and searched the area but did not locate a prowler. Extra patrol was given. Those young prowlers are quick and nimble -- unlike middle-age prowlers.

9:12 a.m. -- Police were notified by ADT that a hold up alarm at Inn of the Ozarks had been triggered. Officer made contact and found that an employee accidentally pushed the button. No, Virginia, "Hold Up Button" does not mean you are supposed to hold up the button. In fact, don't touch that button except in emergency!

4:01 p.m. -- Caller advised police that a motorcycle lost its cooler on US 62, near Best Western Inn. Police responded but did not locate any cooler. Or, they found it and decided it was surely five o'clock somewhere. But surely not!

5:04 p.m. -- Caller advised police of a possible trespasser that had set up a tent and was renting bikes from the property. When police arrived, there were not any persons located at the tent. Officer to check with general manager, as well as check with city for temporary license.

9:05 p.m. -- Officers responded to call about a person driving reckless, in a Cadillac, on Spring Street. Caller advised that an elderly man was yelling at them. The caller advised that the driver was now parked for the night and asked to take information in case anything else happened. Sometimes elderly men in Cadillacs get their kicks by yelling at young folks. Haven't you heard? It's the latest fad.

9:07 p.m. -- Caller advised police of a semi that had smoke coming from it on US 62. Officer responded and spoke with driver who advised police it was a mechanical problem and he was doing everything he could at the moment. He's giving it all he's got, Captain!

July 21

12:54 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to Jack's Place on report of a fight. Officer responded and requested EMS for one of the people. All parties decided to go separate ways and advised that they did not need EMS. Report was taken. Shake it off.

6:12 a.m. -- Police were called to Eureka Street on report of an intoxicated man passed out in the yard. Officer responded and woke up the male and sent him home. He lived nearby. But, hey, sometimes you just have to sleep where you're at.

6:32 a.m. -- Caller advised police of a man asleep on the grass on Spring Street. Officer responded and woke up the male and sent him home. He lived nearby. Apparently there was an epidemic of this going around Saturday morning.

8:14 a.m. -- Police were dispatched to Alpine Liquor for theft report. Officer responded and took report.

11:25 a.m. -- Police made contact with a suspicious person. Officer arrested the subject for public intoxication. Sometimes those crazy fun nights lead you right, left, then back right and then you get arrested for public intox.

6:27 p.m. -- Police were advised of people on a bus being exposed to CO2. The transit needed assistance in finding transportation for the people. Five people were transported to Eureka Springs Hospital. All others took the trolley home.

9:29 p.m. -- Caller advised police of a black Dodge Ram pickup blocking the parking lot of Eureka Live. Officer responded but when he arrived the vehicle was gone.

July 22

12:36 a.m. -- Caller advised police of an intoxicated person driving a silver hatchback. Officer responded but was unable to locate a hatchback or any intoxicated person.

12:44 a.m. -- Caller advised police of a fight in front of the Rowdy Beaver downtown. Caller advised that a bystander was holding down a male. Officer responded and subjects went their separate ways. Those Rowdy Beavers are at it again.

12:46 p.m. -- Caller reported a dog tied to a tree at Carolyn's Ozark Swiss Inn. Officer responded and found it was a rescue dog and it was mostly being kept indoors and the dog was currently having outside time. Dog rescuer also stated that this is temporary since the dog will go to its permanent home in a few days. Everyone needs a little outside time.

2:09 p.m. -- Caller reported a baby deer, and two puppies left in the bed of a pickup truck. Officer responded for a welfare check; owners were located and all animals were OK. A deer? Where would one acquire a deer? Perhaps any street in Eureka?

10:22 p.m. -- Caller advised of an intoxicated couple arguing in the parking lot of Days Inn. Officer responded and called a cab for the couple. At least the fight doesn't have to be in public.